Ode to Drugs

Advil, Midol, Ibuprofen, Aleve,
I had a terrible headache and you helped me fight it off.
But, like the cat, it came back the next day so I tried something stronger
and we still couldn't find a way to make it leave.

I then got a cough
which then made my lungs hurt to breathe
which didn't help my headache

I thought Robitussin was the answer, but I was wrong
Though you helped me sleep through the night,
I woke up feeling like a bus ran me over.

Time to call in the big guns.

Oh Penicillin, how I love the way you make me feel after I take you.
You get rid of my cough,
You get rid of the yucky bacteria that has tried to take over my body,
You make me feel like a woman again.

Don't worry Immunization Steroid,
I'm not leaving you out.
How can I forget how you helped me feel 10 times better after
having you be jabbed in my buttocks.
You mixed with Orange juice sure made me feel like an Incredible.

Though you guys are fantastic,
and you've helped me live through my terrible sore throat,
I sarcastically want to express "Thanks for screwing with a cycle I've been monitoring very closely."

Yes, I had a severe sore throat at the beginning of the year and thought I could fix it myself with Robitussin PM, lots of pain relievers and other over the counter drugs I have at home. Nothing was working, so I had to go to the Dr. Befoer I left his office, they gave me a B12 in the right cheek and an immunization steroid on the left! OUCH! I was prescribed Amoxicillin which is a penicillin. I knew it messes with certain things but I had too much faith in my body. Now here it is, a month later and all the drugs I took I'm sure have effected my cycle which is late, but the test is negative.